logicbutton (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
logicbutton) wrote2006-07-13 07:37 pm
logicbutton) wrote2006-07-13 07:37 pm
Pirates of the Caribbean
SO HAY GUYS, YOU THINK JACK'S DEAD, THEN??
More importantly, he was wrong about Elizabeth looking best in a dress or naked. Keira Knightley is way hot dressed as a boy. Definitely hotter than in a dress, and possibly even hotter than naked. It's an immutable law of the universe, Captain Sparrow. Boys' clothes make hot girls hotter.
Now, on to this makeout business. I have to say, I saw almost no sexual tension between Elizabeth and Jack in CBP, except for the beach scene where Elizabeth was pretending and Jack was drunk. One could argue that she was pretending this time around, too, except. Dude. She may have had her reasons here, but there was no pretense. Conversely, I was highly disappointed with the complete lack of sexual tension between Jack and Will that was so very thick in CBP. The next movie better have a threesome, I mean, for real. If they really plan to make it the last one, the next movie can be an all-bets-are-off type of deal, like with X3, except Pirates could do it right. By having a Jack/Will/Elizabeth threesome, you see. Possibly Norrington could come too.
...Seriously. Jack and Will and Elizabeth so very obviously all want each other. Not that I blame them.
The bad guy government dude didn't sit well with me. His ambiguity was lacking, whereas CBP Norrington consistently gave off vibes of being a good guy, really, just not on the "good guys'" side. It bothered me, because the first movie was really excellent at making sure everyone had some grey in them. The DMC Norrington replacement just sort of came off as a generic faceless jerk.
Jack's character is becoming a little too familiar. I thought part of his appeal was that he was a total mystery to anyone with a normal brain, but in DMC we started seeing a more vulnerable side of him that just turned me off. I don't want to see what makes Jack Sparrow tick; I want to be entertained by his calculated absurdity that doesn't seem so weirdly logical until after the fact. Sorry. And then he went all soft and friends-saving and not-self-serving and what. Jack, your moral ambiguity is your most endearing quality! That and your hilarious run! Don't become predictable!
I felt that there was a distinct shift in tone in characterization (Jack is the most obvious example) that can't be explained away as individual character growth without seeming pastede on yay, and also, more disturbingly, a shift in tone in humor. There were definitely fewer truly funny lines of dialogue--"An undead monkey; top that" being an exception and personal favorite, because, hello, zombies and monkeys really are a can't-miss combination--and more reliance on physical humor. No hilarious sea turtle conversations here. Fortunately, the way Jack Sparrow carries himself will never not be funny, and Elizabeth's annoyance at Jack, Will, and Norrington's swordfighting pissing contest was metatastically beautiful. The nods to the first movie (like the guys in jail trying to lure someone toward them...is it a dog?...no, wait, it's Elizabeth!) are more cute and amusing than really funny.
Although Pirates is progressing in typical trilogy form plotwise, I was disappointed at the looser plot of DMC. Granted, CBP pretty much had the bestest plot of anything ever, but if the producers/writers/whatever were capable of something that awesome, surely they could have come up with something more coherent, at least. You know how in the beginning, Jack is explaining the significance of the key to his crew, and he makes no sense, and we don't actually find out what the deal is until about an hour later? That's how I felt about a lot of the plot points in the movie. Also, like I said, I know it's convention to make the first movie in a trilogy self-contained, and then give the second a cliffhanger ending, but I have never liked that.
On to the music. Now, while CBP had more of a cohesive soundtrack, DMC's gave me a better feeling of power in general. I am, of course, not including the scene in CBP where the Black Pearl crew walks on the floor of the ocean toward the shore, because nothing can ever top that. But not only did DMC's soundtrack have more of that cello riff I love, they developed more variations on the melody, which is awesome. I haven't decided yet how I feel about the carnival music in the scene where the guys are trying to swing those giant ball things toward the side of the cliff, because even though I laughed out loud, and even though I love meta, the meta in Pirates is a more subtle type, whereas the music in that scene brought it a little closer than usual to breaking the fourth wall. Again, though, I laughed out loud, so. Edit: It's in the OST album, too, and it's making me laugh out loud again. Dammit, Pirates, be less funny so I can disapprove in peace! Oh my God, you guys, I'm listening to the soundtrack now, and it's so awesome I think I'm going to buy it. I also want to have the cellist's babies. [/edit]
Okay, reading through this, I've been terribly critical of this movie, which doesn't at all reflect how I felt about it. I loved it. I laughed harder at it than I think I have at any movie since CBP, and I thought all the actors were wonderful, and I will probably buy the DVD, and I will definitely go see the next movie, and then I will go to all my friends' Pirates marathon parties. Whether I would have considered it worthy to watch during a celebration of my twenty-first birthday while drinking half a bottle of butterscotch schnaps will have to wait until future viewings, however. But I also think it's relevant to mention that I liked CBP a lot more after watching it a second time, so we'll see; maybe I'll really end up loving this one.
In conclusion, threesome. Possibly foursome.
More importantly, he was wrong about Elizabeth looking best in a dress or naked. Keira Knightley is way hot dressed as a boy. Definitely hotter than in a dress, and possibly even hotter than naked. It's an immutable law of the universe, Captain Sparrow. Boys' clothes make hot girls hotter.
Now, on to this makeout business. I have to say, I saw almost no sexual tension between Elizabeth and Jack in CBP, except for the beach scene where Elizabeth was pretending and Jack was drunk. One could argue that she was pretending this time around, too, except. Dude. She may have had her reasons here, but there was no pretense. Conversely, I was highly disappointed with the complete lack of sexual tension between Jack and Will that was so very thick in CBP. The next movie better have a threesome, I mean, for real. If they really plan to make it the last one, the next movie can be an all-bets-are-off type of deal, like with X3, except Pirates could do it right. By having a Jack/Will/Elizabeth threesome, you see. Possibly Norrington could come too.
...Seriously. Jack and Will and Elizabeth so very obviously all want each other. Not that I blame them.
The bad guy government dude didn't sit well with me. His ambiguity was lacking, whereas CBP Norrington consistently gave off vibes of being a good guy, really, just not on the "good guys'" side. It bothered me, because the first movie was really excellent at making sure everyone had some grey in them. The DMC Norrington replacement just sort of came off as a generic faceless jerk.
Jack's character is becoming a little too familiar. I thought part of his appeal was that he was a total mystery to anyone with a normal brain, but in DMC we started seeing a more vulnerable side of him that just turned me off. I don't want to see what makes Jack Sparrow tick; I want to be entertained by his calculated absurdity that doesn't seem so weirdly logical until after the fact. Sorry. And then he went all soft and friends-saving and not-self-serving and what. Jack, your moral ambiguity is your most endearing quality! That and your hilarious run! Don't become predictable!
I felt that there was a distinct shift in tone in characterization (Jack is the most obvious example) that can't be explained away as individual character growth without seeming pastede on yay, and also, more disturbingly, a shift in tone in humor. There were definitely fewer truly funny lines of dialogue--"An undead monkey; top that" being an exception and personal favorite, because, hello, zombies and monkeys really are a can't-miss combination--and more reliance on physical humor. No hilarious sea turtle conversations here. Fortunately, the way Jack Sparrow carries himself will never not be funny, and Elizabeth's annoyance at Jack, Will, and Norrington's swordfighting pissing contest was metatastically beautiful. The nods to the first movie (like the guys in jail trying to lure someone toward them...is it a dog?...no, wait, it's Elizabeth!) are more cute and amusing than really funny.
Although Pirates is progressing in typical trilogy form plotwise, I was disappointed at the looser plot of DMC. Granted, CBP pretty much had the bestest plot of anything ever, but if the producers/writers/whatever were capable of something that awesome, surely they could have come up with something more coherent, at least. You know how in the beginning, Jack is explaining the significance of the key to his crew, and he makes no sense, and we don't actually find out what the deal is until about an hour later? That's how I felt about a lot of the plot points in the movie. Also, like I said, I know it's convention to make the first movie in a trilogy self-contained, and then give the second a cliffhanger ending, but I have never liked that.
On to the music. Now, while CBP had more of a cohesive soundtrack, DMC's gave me a better feeling of power in general. I am, of course, not including the scene in CBP where the Black Pearl crew walks on the floor of the ocean toward the shore, because nothing can ever top that. But not only did DMC's soundtrack have more of that cello riff I love, they developed more variations on the melody, which is awesome. I haven't decided yet how I feel about the carnival music in the scene where the guys are trying to swing those giant ball things toward the side of the cliff, because even though I laughed out loud, and even though I love meta, the meta in Pirates is a more subtle type, whereas the music in that scene brought it a little closer than usual to breaking the fourth wall. Again, though, I laughed out loud, so. Edit: It's in the OST album, too, and it's making me laugh out loud again. Dammit, Pirates, be less funny so I can disapprove in peace! Oh my God, you guys, I'm listening to the soundtrack now, and it's so awesome I think I'm going to buy it. I also want to have the cellist's babies. [/edit]
Okay, reading through this, I've been terribly critical of this movie, which doesn't at all reflect how I felt about it. I loved it. I laughed harder at it than I think I have at any movie since CBP, and I thought all the actors were wonderful, and I will probably buy the DVD, and I will definitely go see the next movie, and then I will go to all my friends' Pirates marathon parties. Whether I would have considered it worthy to watch during a celebration of my twenty-first birthday while drinking half a bottle of butterscotch schnaps will have to wait until future viewings, however. But I also think it's relevant to mention that I liked CBP a lot more after watching it a second time, so we'll see; maybe I'll really end up loving this one.
In conclusion, threesome. Possibly foursome.